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More and more people are Swinging - that's the Good News.

Unfortunately though, it's sometimes difficult as a newbie to navigate these new avenues. The Swing Community is THE place to relax your inhibitions and explore your sexuality.

Here are a few Tips to make your adventures smoother. The best advice is the popular dictate of C.S.A.S.C. (Common Sense and Social Courtesy) - basically relate to each other with understanding, thoughtfulness, and common courtesy; just as you wish to be treated.

BE YOURSELF - People are interested in you, so relax and be yourself. However, this does not mean go ahead and act like an ass, disrespecting others and acting like a jerk. It means don't put on an act, or a show just be who you are.

BE COURTEOUS - Be aware that this is a lifestyle full of insecurities, uncertainties and fears. Courteously is how we all want to be treated - with kindness, thoughtfulness, understanding and sensitivity. In essence, courtesy is our treating people the way we ourselves want to be treated.

BE FRIENDLY - Whether or not you are personally interested in swinging with someone, be polite. You never know, you may share many other interests or you may meet that person again, and they may introduce you to someone with whom you ARE compatible and do wish to share time.

RESPOND TO ALL INVITATIONS - RSVP means please reply to the invitation. It does NOT mean reply only if you plan to attend. The most frustrating part of hosting, be it a party, a group or another couple, is people who are discourteous enough not to respond, PERIOD. Good etiquette and good social courtesy DEMAND you respond, by either calling or writing to say yes OR no.

NEVER ARRIVE EMPTY HANDED - When you go to someone's home for a party, ask if there is something you can bring. (it's amazing how many supplies, other than food are used up at an average party.) If you are not going as a couple, a house- gift is appropriate (and not necessarily wine.)

GO PREPARED - Take whatever you personally are going to need with you. Carry a small overnight bag for lingerie or robe, hairbrush, comb, toothbrush, cologne, intimate cleansing articles, condoms, etc. If you plan to stay over, sleeping bags or blankets and pillows are necessities.

CLEANLINESS - Nothing turns a person off faster and more effectively than an unclean body or unfresh breath. Even if you shower and perfume yourself before you leave home, it is always a good idea to freshen up again when you arrive at your destination. It is amazing what time to drive somewhere, stop for a bite, or whatever, can do or rather UNDO.

RESPECT OTHERS' FEELINGS - Beware, not everyone is comfortable in all situations, Keep your eyes open for signs that your partner, as well as others, is relaxed and enjoying themselves. If someone is not comfortable, try helping them over the rough spots. Remember, you were a beginner once yourself. If it is obvious that things are not working out, remain polite and courteous; but alert the host. Keep in mind that not all people feel the same about things.

DON'T BE PUSHY - If you are interested in swinging with someone, let them know in an inviting way; if they are interested, they willrespond positively. If they are not and say "No, thank you," do not ask WHY. No amount of sweet talk or coercion on your part will change their mind and will probably work against you. Everyone has the right to say "NO" at all times, to anyone, without explanation. Do not ever forget that.

ONLY DO WHAT IS FUN FOR YOU - Do not allow yourself to become sexually involved with anybody that you are not interested in. There is no reason to involve yourself in a scene that you are not comfortable with. You are in the lifestyle to enjoy yourself, so only do what you want, when you want and with whom you want.

HOW AND WHY TO SAY NO - One of the basic etiquettes in swinging is the right of anyone to say "No". Experience has taught most people that everybody is not right for everybody else. Improper handling of a situation, however, can lead to a lot of hurt or very bad feelings. The swing world accepts the premise that everyone has the right to say "No" to anyone at anytime and it should be done with a simple "No, thank you". Never give an explanation, because that is what usually causes the problems and the pain.

ALCOHOL OR DRUGS - Most of us do not use DRUGs, although some of us drink socially. At times, a few drinks are nice to help you "relax". Over-indulging may hamper your physical abilities, as well as offend or turn other people off to you. If you have to over indulge in order to participate in swinging, you are involved in the wrong lifestyle.

PRACTICE SAFER SEX - It is up to us to protect ourselves as well as our partners. With the present concern over sexually transmitted diseases such as syphilis, gonorrhea, aids, yeast infection, etc., the use of condoms should not offend anybody. Anyone not willing to take this precaution is acting selfishly and irresponsibly. You are not being accused of being unclean, but simply someone wishes to provide you both with protection.

CALL TO SAY THANKS - Most people only use the telephone if they are going to go somewhere. Lost seems to the social ambiance of a 'Thank-You Note' or phone call to someone whose hospitality you enjoyed. It means a lot to most people, and they will surely remember you when planning their next event. Don't you like to be thanked?

BE GOOD HOSTS - When you have people coming to your home, try to anticipate their needs: put clean sheets on the beds; keep plenty of clean washcloths and towels available. Show your guests through the house so that they will know where the bathrooms, kitchen, and other
rooms are located.

ENJOY YOURSELF - Most important, have a good time, act out your fantasies, explore your own sexuality and enjoy everything this lifestyle has to offer with enthusiasm, laughter and a positive attitude. ARRIVE ON TIME - it is considered rude to arrive anywhere late.

IF YOU ARRIVE AS A COUPLE - LEAVE AS A COUPLE WHEN ATTENDING A SWING DANCE OR PARTY - in case you don't know why....it is extremely rude to leave your partner at a party by his/herself.

ATTRACTIVE BUT CASUAL PARTY CLOTHES are usually best - If you're attending an on-premise party, take a robe, negligee or other slip-on. You may find it more comfortable as the evening continues.

A GOOD MENTAL ATTITUDE AND EMOTIONAL HEALTH will make you popular . No one appreciates the negative person with nothing good to say about anything including the party, patrons or swinging in general.. The person with the smile, ready laugh and obvious interest in others is the person others like to be around.

EVERYONE HAS THE RIGHT OF REFUSAL - You shouldn't swing with a person unless you want to, and they don't have to swing with you. Be honest with your feelings and desires, and expect others to do the same. Only ask those you want to say "yes". If they say "no", take it graciously and don't try to coax, pressure, or persuade them to change their mind. When you say "yes" to others, be honest and enthusiastic. When you say "no", be tactful and courteous.

DON'T TAKE SOMEONE TO A SWING PARTY WHO IS NOT FULLY INFORMED as to the nature of the party and their expected behavior. Can you imagine what a shock that would be.

DON'T DISTURB THE SWINGING ENJOYMENT OF OTHERS in a bedroom or other swing area with loud or prolonged talk. It would be considered rude in any environment never mind a swingers party.

DON'T BE A BEDROOM "CRUISER" - Looking into bedrooms, pulling back curtains, turning on lights and going into private swing areas as a stag to see if you can get involved in something, are major breaches etiquette. If you become known for such behavior, you may find that
swing party invitations become few and far between.

ILLEGAL SUBSTANCES, INCLUDING MARIJUANA, ARE PROHIBITED at responsible swing clubs and private parties. Swinging is its own pleasure, don't dilute it and don't subject yourself and others to legal problems.

IF A PARTY IS BYOB (BRING YOUR OWN BOTTLE), ONLY DRINK WHAT YOU BRING - Never help yourself to what others have brought without their permission.

TELL THE HOSTS if another guest causes a problem, won't take "no" for an answer, or is objectionable in any real way. They sincerely want to know so they can correct the problem.

IF IT JUST ISN'T YOUR THING, LEAVE - to speak badly of a party to the other people is simply poor manners.