Sexy TIMES
 


Welcome to Sexy TIMES!

This blog will report various, often random and sometimes dubious thoughts, quirks, observations, trivia, tales, questions, dreams, rants, opinions, truths, musings, stories, lies, hopes, moans, fantasies, etc in the hope of tempting you to get involved.

Our mission is to put the facts in the public domain!

Please feel free to write a letter to the editor at LETTERS TO THE EDITOR.

Back issues of Sexy TIMES are available at INDEX OF BACK ISSUES


Sexy TIMES editor: spunkycumfun, Esq.
Sexy TIMES proprietor: Rupert Murdoch
Sexy TIMES executive designer: [blog cherimore]

The editor and, of course, the proprietor take no responsibility for accuracy of the content, nor any responsibility for the propriety of how the content was gathered. Otherwise, Sexy TIMES subscribes to the highest ethical standards of journalism.
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LETTERS TO THE EDITOR
Posted:Nov 25, 2012 7:42 am
Last Updated:Jun 2, 2022 3:26 am
1002000 Views


This is Sexy TIMES’ letters page.

Please feel free to post a letter to the editor, whether it is to say hello, to make an observation, to make a request, to issue a statement or even to make a complaint!

All letters will be printed, and all letters will be answered.
95 Comments
TALES FROM THE DARK SIDE
Posted:Feb 20, 2022 6:08 am
Last Updated:Jun 2, 2022 3:26 am
43113 Views


Recently, I have been going over to the Dark Side a lot more given that the Light Side is soon to be obliterated! Andrew, the Master of the Dark Side, has very recently posted that the switch to the Dark Side will be very imminent, days not weeks. The switchover is likely to be staggered with some moving over before others.

I have now set up shop over on the Dark Side; I have edited my blog description, uploaded a few photos, created a sticky private mailbox, indexed all my blog posts, set my alerts how I want to be alerted, and checked the blogs I follow here are the ones I follow there.

Though there are other bloggers who are far more expert about the Dark Side, I thought I would share my experiences of my incursions on the Dark Side.

Though slightly different than the Light Side, it is relatively easy to submit a blog post. I had to seek a little advice about how to make links to blog posts, how to make blog posts private and how to make posts sticky. But I got there in the end with very little frustration.

Posts submitted on the Dark Side appear far quicker than they do on the Light Side; here, I can wait for hours before my blog post goes live. The Dark Side is the fast side!

The spellchecker works well on the Dark Side, though unfortunately it is an American English spellcheck but spellchecking long went extinct here on the Light Side.

There are no serious glitches to posts submitted on the Dark Side. Little words do not get stolen and punctuation marks do not get mangled. And there is no need for the obligatory first comment to get my blog posts to register!

I cannot claim to have mastered how to do line-breaks, how to use different colours, how to post emojis, and how to utilise italics, bold and underline but, with the help of others, I will get there!

I found that the list of all blogs I follow here was not successfully migrated over to the Dark Side. About 20 blogs never made it over, but about 30 blogs who I do not follow here are now on my followed list over there. I had to manually add the missing followed blogs, which was a bit of a pain. The way to search for a blog on the Dark Side is by its blog title and not by the username of the blogger. This was a little annoying as I remember usernames far better than blog names. So please think SEXY TIMES and not spunkycumfun if you want to find me over on the Dark Side!

There is very little chance of finding a blogger whose blog is titled My Blog. There are far too many My Blogs; it is like finding a needle in a haystack!

Also what I find on the Dark Side is that it is very busy and bewildering. One advantage of the Light Side here is the menu page of blogland which gives me a quick overview of who has posted, new posts of followed blogs and new comments to my blog posts. The highlights work well here; there are no highlights on the Dark Side.

Over on the Dark Side, when entering you are confronted with an array of lists - new blog posts, popular bloggers, trending bloggers, trending blogs, new blogs, etc. Initially I found I was scrolling down and clicking a lot and generally getting lost down a rabbit hole before having to escape to get my bearings. I now just look at the list of new blog posts to see whether anything takes my fancy. I am not interested in who the popular and trending bloggers are. The Dark Side should stop the unseemly scramble to be top blogger and reduce the potential for blog wars or, at least, should allow you to not witness these shenanigans!

I manage the initial chaos of the Dark Side by my alerts. I am alerted only when a blogger I follow submits a new post and when a blogger comments on my blog posts. I use the alerts as a guide around the Dark Side. I have also followed more bloggers over there so I have more control over what blog posts I read rather than relying on the long and never-ending lists to find a blog post that I may be interested in reading.

On the Dark Side, the many lists of blogs do not indicate the age, gender and sexuality of the bloggers at the outset. I often enter Brit-hating, no-cocks-allowed blog posts written by teenagers! Not really, but I hope you get my drift.

I still cannot understand what the fuss is all about with levels ascribed to bloggers and kudos accrued by bloggers. But no doubt it will become clear. I still have my points; the Master of the Dark Side is not stealing them!

The best thing about the Dark Side, in my opinion, is that it is far more interactive than the Light Side. New blog posts show up very quickly, plus comments and replies to comments on blog posts appear immediately. It is like having a conversation with someone. Here on the Light Side, it is a bit of a hit-and-run and maybe come back much later to continue the discussion. The Dark Side is the live side!

If still on the Light Side, how ready are you for the Dark Side?
If on the Dark Side, is there anything you miss from the Light Side?


Though initially hostile to the Dark Side - well, it was a car crash when first rolled out last year, it has improved greatly largely thanks to the sterling efforts of Andrew. I will be pleased that blogland moves over to the Dark Side because it is time-consuming checking both the Light Side and Dark Side during this interim period.

The Dark Side is dark. Dark is good; light is bad! I have now seen the light and it is dark!

Perhaps naively, I think the Dark Side, especially as it will be opened up to non-members, may be the start of a new golden age for blogland.

This will be my last blog post here on the Light Side. If you want to read my posts, I will be over on the Dark Side. However, I will continue to check in on the Light Side to say hello to my friends here and comment on their blog posts here. But I suspect the Light Side will be soon exterminated by the Master of the Dark Side!

I hope to see you all on the Dark Side. May the Force be with you!

30 Comments
WHEN DID YOU LAST CHANGE YOUR MIND?
Posted:Feb 19, 2022 5:56 am
Last Updated:Mar 17, 2022 3:29 am
29470 Views


Research has shown that once people form a view, it is very difficult for these views to change even if there is clear evidence to the contrary to their views. Psychologists, sociologists, political scientists, anthropologists and economists have long found that opinions, once formed, are difficult to shift.

People, myself included, like to think we change our minds to fit the evidence, facts and data. But, as Albert Einstein quipped, people often change the so-called facts to fit in with their views. Fake news comes to mind! I think may be better at changing their mind than adults!

My mind has changed but rarely overnight. My opinions evolve over time as a result of conversations, experiences and reading around. For example, I used to say that I was not a feminist because I believed that a man could not transcend his gender. After reading a book by Caitlin Moran, which simply argued that whatever a man can do, a woman should be allowed to do. I realised that my view was rubbish. I am now very happy to call myself a feminist.

Sexually, I have changed my views over time. Things that I enjoy sexually now were often things that either I never considered or never thought I would like. I now realise there is more to sex than the missionary position; there is the doggy position! I am now far more open to sexual possibilities, though I will draw a line at having my balls electrocuted!

When was the last time you changed your mind?
How have your views on sex changed over time?


The last time I changed my mind was when I attended a lecture given by a professor on his research on the emigration of trained and skilled nurses from Caribbean islands to Britain. It may not sound exciting but his lecture changed my views. Before the lecture, I was of the opinion that this emigration was not a good thing as Britain was depriving much poorer countries of their nurses; for me, it was a form of exploitative neo-colonialism.

However, the professor argued that this emigration was good for both Britain and the Caribbean countries. The governments of these Caribbean countries deliberately trained far more nurses than what was needed and the nurses who worked to Britain regularly sent money to their families still living in the Caribbean. Basically, nurses were a valuable source of export earnings for these relatively poor countries and they were essential in staffing the hospitals in Britain. My initial, uninformed opinion immediately shifted within one hour from this is generally a bad thing to this is generally a good thing.

22 Comments
AN INTERVIEW WITH AN ENIGMA
Posted:Feb 17, 2022 4:43 am
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2022 6:06 am
30228 Views


Recently, I interviewed EnigmaInitiative, a long-standing and very popular member of blogland. Below are her great answers to the questions I asked in the interview. Men may want to cover their balls and check their arse while reading the interview!
____________________________________

What three words would you use and what three words would your close friends use to describe your personality?
I would use unconventional, goofy, and introspective.
Let us go to the peanut gallery:
Nick, my roommate and partner, who has known me for nine years said: unique, unpredictable, and kind.
My female cousin who has known me my entire life said: kind, caring, and free spirited.
Logan, my poly lover who lives in Michigan and has known me fourteen years said: funny, unpredictable, and free spirited.
A female friend who has known me for eight years said: kind, passionate, and free spirited.
Ex-husband Number 3 who has known me for twenty-three years said: sarcastic, free spirited, and unpredictable.

What traits most turn you on and off people?
Personality traits are most likely to turn me on such as wit, intelligence, and being into compatible kinky shit plays high into my attraction to someone.
What turns me off most are closed minded people who think of the world in absolutes. Life is rarely as black and white as some people seem to believe it is, and nuance is lost on many.

Why did you join this site? And in particular why did you decide to blog?
I originally joined this site back when it first started and we were all using dial-up as a way to connect to the internet. I have had so many screen names over the years, I cannot even remember most of them.
After three marriages, I realized that I do not enjoy traditional relationships. I tend to keep people at a distance and can be incredibly independent and immensely introverted which can be difficult for the other person in a serious relationship. I prefer to keep intimate relationships closer to friends with benefits than living together/marriage.
I started blogging because I enjoy writing and connecting with people from a distance. I found the blogs one day when looking around the site. Originally, I stuck to chatrooms, the IM, and emailing people.

On your profile you describe your occupation as an artist. What type of art do you make?
Truth is, I am using artist as a vague descriptive term for what I do. That is, creating items to sell in order to support a non-profit created and run by me and Nick helping the homeless cat and human populations. I would prefer not to get into specifics in a public forum for a variety of reasons.

Your regular Friday Farm Day blog posts have quickly become popular postings in blogland. Would you describe yourself as an urban farmer? If not, are you a frustrated farmer?
I enjoy doing them. I would describe what I am doing as experimental gardening. I approach my garden kind of like I do my life; learn and try stuff and see what happens, as well as attempting to be more grounded in sustainability. I prefer buying seeds for things that you do not typically see in the grocery store that are heirloom in nature.
If I had more space, I could see myself turning into something more akin to a farmer, growing higher quantities of food to give away to those in need.

What is your favourite book, movie and song? And why are they your favourites?
I typically do not have individual favorites, and things change for me all the time based on my mood or any number of other things. My favorite genre to read has always been mystery/thrillers because I enjoy trying to figure out things. My favorite genre of movies, currently, is superhero movies (Marvel, DC) because I am a nerd who likes the idea that there are special people out there doing good in the world. And, my favorite era of music remains in the seventies because it speaks to my soul.

When a , what did you want to be when you grew up?
This is easy, I wanted to be a teacher.

When was the happiest time of your life, and why?
I would say that I am most content with my life now. After doing a lot of work on myself, work that continues to this day, deconstructing some of the toxic things I learned that reflected in my behavior throughout my life, I am happy with who I am and the direction I have chosen to continue to strive towards.
My happiest day, however, will forever be the day my was born for obvious reasons.

If you had to live your life in another time and place, when and where would you be?
I think I would love to be a madam of an English bordello back in the 18th century. The show Harlots on Hulu has probably affected me and glamorized it far too much. LOL.

How many times so far have you fallen in love?
This is a difficult question for me, as I am not sure I have ever been in love. I have a great deal of empathy and love for lots of people with whom I was in a romantic relationship. In fact, I still love them all in my own way. But, in love is a concept I struggle with due to some philosophical and psychological reasons that could take pages to explain.

Have you met up with any people from this site? And if so, have you had sex with anyone from this site?
Tons, actually. From casual relationships to serious ones, I have met all kinds of people from here in real life and had sex with them.
There used to be a meet-up from the chatroom I frequented on this site in Michigan, not too far from where I lived. I would go to those once in a while back in the mid-2000s.
Logan, who I have been in a relationship with since 2008, I met on this site.
Eight or nine years ago, under a different profile when I first started blogging, I wrote erotic stories about the sex I had with a couple of the people I met here.
And, I have met others in recent years, even some under this profile name.
I have also met people from here and became friends. Speaking of, TicklePlease (a blogger here) and I met some years back. I went to visit her, and we had a blast together with her showing me the sites in her area.
Like superbj, I would call myself an BlackSexMatch.com success story.

If you had to advise someone on how best to seduce you, what advice would you give?
Make an effort to get to know me, actions speak louder than words, seduce my mind by being able to talk about sex and kink freely and intelligently, and enjoy compatible kinks.

In one of your blog posts, you said that you used to be a camgirl. How did you get to be a camgirl? And was it a rewarding job?
Funny story, before this site had points and all that bullshit, I used to get on cam here and do stripteases onto masturbation accompanied by music. I was pretty popular, often getting hundreds in a stream at once. There was another blogger here (cannot remember her name) who wrote about how she was camming and getting paid to do it on another site. I thought, why not get paid for something I am doing for free?
It was rewarding for a time, but after a while it became a chore due to all the entitled dudebros and trolls. So, I just stopped doing it.

What is the most number of people you have had sex with in one day?
When I first moved here to Orlando in 2013, I went to a swingers club a few times. I would say my top number was above ten, but it is not like I was counting. Once it got out that I was a squirter, there was not a lot of downtime for me. They kept asking, and I kept saying yes.

Have you engaged in group sex, that is, sex with more than two people involved? If so, what type or types of group sex have you been involved in?
But, of course. I have done MMFF, MMF and FFM in a bunch of configurations, and a group of two women and four men.

What has been your kinkiest sexual act?
I suppose the kinkiest thing I have done was to tie up a guys dick and balls, place ball weights on, tie his hands and feet to a cross, stick a butt plug up his ass, and tease him mercilessly.
The kinkiest thing I have had done to me was to have Shibari rope work done on me completely naked while wearing chopsticks fashioned into nipple clamps and being masturbated in public (at a dungeon).

What has been your most embarrassing sexual moment?
There is something that can happen sometimes with anal sex, I am sure you and all your readers know to what I am referring.

Are there any sexual acts that you have not done that you would like to do?
Acts in and of themselves? No, I have done every sexual act I ever wanted to try.
Complicated role play scenarios that would require more than one compatible trusted partner, planning, and script outlines? Better believe I have a few.

What is your perfect three-course meal? And what drink would you have with the meal?
Caesar salad.
Steak, med rare, seasoned with only salt and fresh cracked black pepper. Baked potato with butter, chives, corn, and fresh cracked black pepper on it.
Layered chocolate cake with ermine frosting and homemade vanilla bean ice cream made from custard.
It is a groaner, but Diet Coke is my preferred drink.

If you could invite three people, dead or alive, to join you at a dinner party, who would you invite?
This may sound strange and sad, but given my life circumstances I would want it to be my parents and siblings. It is impossible for me to choose between the siblings, so it has to be four. I cannot competently put into words what I would give to be able to talk with all of them again. It has been over forty years since my mother died, and over thirty since my father. I still desperately miss my family as it was before my mother took her life.
____________________________________

Do you have any questions for EnigmaInitiative?
If you would like to read more interviews of bloggers, can you suggest bloggers I should interview?


EnigmaInitiative is happy to stay behind and answer any questions you may have for her. So please post your questions as a comment within.

31 Comments
C IS FOR CUISINE
Posted:Feb 16, 2022 8:22 am
Last Updated:Mar 3, 2022 7:12 am
30884 Views


Above is not me half-naked in the nudist restaurant, Innato, when I last visited Spain! Diners are encouraged to strip off and eat food off the bodies of model waiters and waitresses.

Here in England, our cuisine, though improved over the years, does not have a great reputation internationally. The French, the Greeks, the Italians and the Spanish, but not the Germans, all claim to have a better cuisine than the English. English cuisine has a reputation for being stodgy.

Traditional English dishes are fried breakfasts (bacon, sausages and fried eggs), Sunday roasts (roast beef, chicken, lamb or pork with Yorkshire puddings, roast potatoes, carrots and peas, all lashed with gravy), fish and chips (mainly haddock now that cod stocks are running low), shepherds pie (made with lamb mince) or cottage pie (made with beef mince), and desserts served with custard (such as apple pie, jam roly-poly, rhubarb crumble, sticky toffee pudding, and syrup sponge pudding).

Our cuisine has changed and improved significantly over the last forty years with the increasing influence of American, Belgian, Brazilian, French, Greek, Indian, Italian, Japanese, Korean, Malaysian, Mexican, Middle Eastern, Portuguese, Scandinavian, Spanish and Thai cuisines. This is one big upside of both immigration and globalisation.

What are your views on English food?
What dishes are part of your local cuisine?
What is your favourite local dish?


In Nottingham where I live, there is a peculiar dish of mushy peas served with mint sauce. I have never come across this dish anywhere else; the dish is delicious. I often go to the local market and eat a dish at the mushy pea stall.

If you were to visit me for a meal in Nottingham, I would serve up mushy peas with mint sauce for starters, a roast beef dinner and a syrup sponge pudding for afters, all washed down by a pint of best bitter - see below. I hope you will join me!

Mushy peas with mint sauce:


Roast beef, Yorkshire pudding, roast potatoes, carrots, broccoli and cauliflower cheese with gravy:


Syrup sponge pudding with custard:


Sir Peter Mansfield Best Bitter:
28 Comments
HARLOTS, WHORES AND HACKABOUTS
Posted:Feb 12, 2022 6:29 am
Last Updated:Feb 17, 2022 1:24 am
30593 Views


I read a lot of book reviews; a review is sometimes more interesting than the book! I have just read a review of the recently published book, Harlots, Whores and Hackabouts, written by Kate Lister. So this post is a review of a review of a book!

The book is a history of . In fourteenth-century London, prostitutes frequented streets called Gropecunt Lane, Sluts Hole and Whores Nest.

The book charts the hypocrisy surrounding sex work. The fifteenth-century French king, Charles VII, enjoyed the sexual services of a well remunerated royal mistress while ordering street sex workers to work in state-run brothels for very little money.

The different names for sex workers also reflect a hypocritical hierarchy based on the wealth and power of patrons. At the high end, there are mistresses, courtesans and ; at the low end, there are concubines, harlots and whores. They are all sex workers but their judged worth is dependent on how much they are paid.

Sex for money has a very long history. Governments worldwide have tried to both prohibit and tolerate the sex trade. Attempts to prohibit sex work have invariably focused on the women who sell their sexual services and rarely the men who buy their services. These attempts have largely failed. Sex work still happened and it still happens.

In my opinion, governments should accept that sex work happens and make it a safe activity. I am impressed with how some European cities, though none in Britain, manage sex work. In Amsterdam, for example, the red light district is in the heart of the city centre where bars, restaurants, shops, museums and churches flourish. It is a safe place which can be easily policed; health services can be easily accessed and taxes can be easily collected.

Do you think sex work should be criminalised or decriminalised?
Have you ever paid for sex or ever been paid for sex?


As a liberal, I believe that sex work should be decriminalised. People should be free to sell and buy sex if they freely choose to. However, the freedom to choose varies between people, especially women in the case of sex work. Very poor women may have little choice other than to sell their sexual services just to survive. But this can only be remedied by tackling poverty and gender inequality.

I have not paid for sex unless buying a meal on a date counts! However, I have tried to sell my sexual services. When I first moved to Nottingham, I had no friends here and was a little lonely. I decided to place an advert in the local newspaper offering my sexual services to women. It was not my brightest idea. No woman contacted me and I had to change my mobile phone number after receiving unwanted and often offensive phone calls, voicemail messages and texts from men. My career as a male was very short-lived!

Below is the Jean-Leon Gerome painting, Phryne before the Areopagus.

24 Comments
A PINK POSING POUCH
Posted:Feb 9, 2022 10:07 am
Last Updated:Feb 22, 2022 12:53 pm
31048 Views


Recently, I was asked whether I was romantic or not. I found the question difficult to answer as I have slightly ambivalent attitude towards romance. I like to show my love to someone special but I prefer my gestures to be spontaneous, whether it is a gift, a meal, a show of affection, a love letter or an adventure.

Romance, especially Valentine Day, is very commercialised, stereotyped and choreographed, A few years ago, I went to a restaurant on Valentine Day. Not only did I have to book it well in advance, not only did I have to fit in with the time slots offered by the restaurant and not only did I have to pay well over-the-top for the meal, the restaurant decided to spoil the evening by playing a repeated loop of romantic background music, strong-arming me to buy a very expensive bottle of Champagne and giving me a red rose to give to my Valentine date. It was a dreadful evening.

How romantic are you?
Will you mark Valentine Day? If so, how will you celebrate Valentine Day?


Valentine Day does not mean much to me, though I will send an unsigned Valentine card to my partner, who always knows it from me no matter how hard I try and disguise my handwriting and the lengths I go to post my card from afar. She just hands me a signed Valentine card. I cannot complain because I probably only send a card because I do not want to be shouted at if I did not send one!

Below is a photo of what I would look like if I wore a pink posing pouch!

18 Comments
BULGING COMFY BALLS
Posted:Feb 8, 2022 7:33 am
Last Updated:Feb 27, 2022 2:12 pm
31429 Views


A newspaper advert for Comfyballs recently caught my attention. Yes, the brand name drew me in!

Comfyballs are a brand of underwear for men. On reading further, Comfyballs boxer shorts, and I quote, feature a unique PackageFront design, which cups your equipment and takes it away from your inner thigh. What more can a man want, ethically-produced and climate-neutral underwear with a built-in bulge?!

Still intrigued, I searched for a review of Comfyballs underwear. One reviewer, called G, wrote: There is not a lot to report on the pants except that they are comfortable. If there was something annoying about them I would have more to say but they are great. As this is not a ringing endorsement for Comfyballs, I decided not to buy. I was at least expecting Comfyballs to enhance my sex appeal and guarantee improved sexual performance!

The company behind Comfyballs dropped the balls and launched a range of Comfy underwear for women; the under. The company clearly did not have the balls to brand its underwear range Comfypussy!

How important is comfort to you when deciding what underwear to buy or wear?
Do you like looking at a bulge of a man?
If a man, do you like showing off your bulge?


Comfort is very important for me when I bear underwear. I find both boxer shorts and thongs uncomfortable to wear. With boxer shorts, things flop around too much; and with thongs, things are far too tight! I like wearing hipster shorts the best; my bulge can bulge proudly in them!

19 Comments
SKI SUNDAY
Posted:Feb 6, 2022 7:17 am
Last Updated:Feb 10, 2022 3:17 am
32323 Views


The Winter Olympics have just got under way. Beijing is the first city, albeit in controversial circumstances, to host both the summer and winter Olympic games. This Winter Olympics are the first when all the snow used is artificial.

I like watching most sports so I will be watching the Winter Olympics, or at least the highlights. My three favourite winter sports are ice hockey, ski cross and curling.

Ice hockey is one of my favourite sports to watch. It is fast, skilful and tough. The Great Britain ice hockey team, now ranked 16th in the world, rarely make it to the Winter Olympics; only eight teams qualify for the games. Great Britain did win a bronze medal in 1924 and, incredibly, a gold medal in 1936. I will be rooting for Canada this Olympics.

I enjoy watching ski cross, especially as a lot of skiers fall over. Ski jumping is good to watch too, particularly if there is a crash landing. Speed skating is also fun as there is much tripping over as skates collide. The bobsleigh, luge and skeleton make for good viewing as the potential for mishaps is high. It seems I like sports with lots of accidents!

Probably the most popular winter sport here, now that Torvill and Dean have long since retired from ice dancing, is curling. Curling is basically bowling on ice. Great Britain, or more accurately Scotland, often wins medals in this sport. Eve Muirhead, a top Scottish Olympian curler, is also good at curling her tongue around the cock of her husband. For proof, see the photo above; this photo is not a fake!

Are you watching the Winter Olympics?
Can you ski or skate?
Have you ever had sex in the snow or on the ice?


I cannot ski nor skate. Once I had a ski lesson on a dry ski slope but it was a dispiriting experience. The ski instructor was far more interested in giving his instruction to my two female friends than me. I was left to my own devices on the slope, which largely meant falling over, and I gave up after seeing lots of effortlessly ski past me.

I have never had sex in the snow or on the ice. I do not think my balls would let my cock have sex in the freezing cold!





32 Comments
MY BLACK-AND-WHITE WEDDING
Posted:Feb 2, 2022 9:05 am
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2022 6:17 am
32391 Views


For my first marriage, I had a black-and-white wedding. I agreed to get married within two weeks and married within six months of meeting my wife-to-be. When I told my parents of my plans to get married, they did not even know I had a girlfriend never mind having met her. In the home of my parents, I announced to them that I getting married. My Dad thought I joking and just carried on reading his farming magazine. My Mum looked at me. I looked back and said it true. She then got up to crack open a bottle of champagne; we all drank champagne pretending to celebrate while my shocked parents were no doubt contemplating the foolishness of it all.

Though not religious, I agreed to marry in a church. The wedding a very pretentious affair - a large black-and-white wedding; it the 1980s! Everyone dressed in black-and-white except for one person; and everything black-and-white at the wedding and reception as far as possible.

At the church, the bride came up the aisle with my friend playing Love Will Tear Us Apart, a Joy Division song, on the organ. After getting wed, we walked down the aisle to Perfect Day, the Lou Reed song. I wanted Walk On the Wild Side by Lou Reed but this vetoed by my bride and her parents. I blame Holly and Candy for the veto; Holly plucked her eyebrows on the way and shaved her legs and then he a she, and Candy never lost her head even when she giving head!

At the reception, everything decked out in black-and-white. Champagne and white wine flowed - we ordered many bottles of the not-so-fine Black Tower white wine. The food consisted of mushroom soup, chicken in a white sauce served with mashed potato and aubergine, the vegetable nearest to black in colour, and Black Forest gateau with cream.

There were two best men. I love wedding speeches! There a free bar. The wedding reception soon became a drunken affair. By the end of the evening, I far too drunk to fuck!

If married or been married, what your wedding (or weddings) like?
Where did you go on honeymoon?


The first night of our honeymoon spent in a luxury hotel in London. Then we drove up to Scotland to spend two weeks in Edinburgh, Glasgow and the Isle of Skye. I had to take some work with me on honeymoon, which very understandably did not go down very well with my wife. Also, I stupidly agreed to stay a week in an isolated cottage, originally built for missionaries, with no television. I missed many football games of the 1986 World Cup, including the infamous game between England and Argentina when England lost to the Hand-of-God goal of Maradona.

23 Comments
A SUPER BJ EXPERIENCE
Posted:Feb 1, 2022 5:03 am
Last Updated:Mar 16, 2022 3:11 am
32785 Views


Recently, I interviewed [blog superbjversion2], a highly regarded member of blogland, always grammatically correct and always half-nekkid every Wednesday. Below are her great answers to the questions I asked in the interview.
____________________________________

Why did you join this site? And in particular why did you decide to blog?
I joined the site out of curiosity. You were not allowed to explore without creating a profile. I have stayed because the Law of Supply and Demand has been in my favor!
I had been on the site for about 18 months when I was introduced to the blogs by a man I was seeing. After reading for a while, I decided to try writing my own. I had stories to tell that my friends were too prim to hear.

The opening words on your profile are, and I quote: I am not a cougar. I am not a side dish. I am not a business perk or travel amenity. Having said that, have you met up with any people from this site? And if so, have you had sex with anyone from this site?
Oh, Lordy, yes and yes. Those statements on my profile are based on experience (multiple times).
I have had dead end meets, one-night stands, weekend trysts, vacation hi-jinks, short term affairs, and long-term relationships; some happening within the same time frame. I would be considered one of the sites success stories.

Do you give guaranteed super blow-jobs?
I hate to bust your fantasy but superbj is a who not a what. BJ is my actual initials. I thought it would be a cute double entendre. While I do give a fairly good blowjob, I can only guarantee its enthusiasm.

What three words would you use and what three words would your close friends use to describe your personality?
My friends would call me smart, nice, and funny.
I would say that I am witty, thoughtful, and curious.

From your blog and profile, you enjoy bowling. Are you in a local bowling team and/or bowling league?
I have been bowling since I was a . I started in youth leagues. I bowled in leagues regularly, as an adult, even winning prize money in tournaments. But league seasons are long. Weekly for 8 or 9 months. That is more of a commitment than I feel like making these days. So, I just enjoy going when the mood strikes me.

What types of books do you like to read? Do you have a favourite book?
From the day I read my first Nancy Drew book, I have been hooked on mysteries. I read other things, of course, but I always return to those who-dunits. My favorite book is whichever I am currently reading.

What types of music do you like to listen to? Do you have a favourite song?
I usually only listen to music when I am driving. Sometimes when I am baking. Rock-n-roll music from the 60s and 70s is probably my favorite but I also listen to classical, folk, a cappella music, and sea shanties. I like songs I can sing along with.
As for a favorite - I gave that some thought. I think, for a song to be a favorite, you have to like it regardless of the version. So my favorite song would be Carol of the Bells. I could listen to that (and have) over and over, no matter who is doing the performance.

What type of movies do you like to watch? Do you have a favourite movie?
My movie preferences have changed over the years. I used to like romantic comedies but since my husband passed away, they make me cry. Horror movies are only fun if you have a manly shoulder to cower upon - and to be honest, the ones made these days are mostly just gory. That leaves Action/Adventure and SciFi/Fantasy. I like both of those, not to mention a good detective movie. But my favorite fits into none of those categories. It's a Wonderful Life with Jimmy Stewart is a movie I never miss.

When a , what did you want to be when you grew up?
I wanted to be the Green Lantern. I was told I could only be Wonder Woman or Supergirl. That forced me into becoming a feminist.

When was the happiest time of your life, and why?
I would say 1970-73. Those were my high school years. I was young, pretty, smart, social, and grew in self-confidence. I have had other happy times in my life, but those years did not carry the weight of responsibility that adult years did.

How many times so far have you fallen in love?
Deep love? True love - when the happiness of the other is more important than your own? Twice.

If you had to live your life in another time and place, when and where would you be?
I would be in Paris, France during the 1920s. Oh! to feel the freedom of that time and place.

In a comment on my blog post on grammar, you admitted to having a pin on your purse saying, I am silently judging your grammar. For me, this begs the question: have you ever thrown someone out of your bed for bad grammar?
I would never throw someone out of my bed for bad grammar. I figure he must be pretty special to have actually gotten IN my bed with bad grammar.

In a recent blog post, you wrote about a long road trip. Was it a naughty road trip?
That last road trip would have been much naughtier if he had joined me in the hot tub!

What has been your kinkiest sexual act?
I was seeing a gent who was much kinkier than I am. He had a duffle bag full of toys and - remember question four, when I said I had a curious nature? That encounter involved four-point restraints, a blind fold, ice cubes, a cucumber, and a hot carrot. When he moved away, my kink level decreased to just HNW.

What has been your most embarrassing sexual moment?
Really, is there anything more embarrassing than farting while someone has his face in your pussy?

Are there any sexual acts that you have not done that you would like to do?
No. I do not have a sexual bucket list though I would still like to have sex on my balcony. But that is a place and not an act.

If you could invite three people, dead or alive, to join you at a dinner party, who would you invite?
I think a fun dinner party would be Edgar Allen Poe, Dame Agatha Christie, and Mark Twain.

What traits most turn you on and off people?
You said people, not men, so I am going to go with personality traits and not physical traits. I like honesty and humor. I dislike whiners.

If you had one wish, what would it be?
If I had one wish to make
this is the wish I would choose
I want an old straw hat, a suit of overalls
and a worn out pair of shoes

That is a verse from a Shirley Temple movie. It popped into my head when I read this question and it leads nicely into my wish. I wish everywhere could enjoy the innocence that childhood should be - free from fear and want and hunger and pain.
____________________________________

Do you have any questions for [blog superbjversion2]?
If you would like to read more interviews of bloggers, do you have any suggestions for my next interview victim?


[blog superbjversion2] is happy to stay behind and answer any questions you may have for her. So please post your questions as a comment within.

28 Comments
TIPS FOR THE DARK SIDE
Posted:Jan 29, 2022 8:03 am
Last Updated:Mar 1, 2022 7:29 am
34039 Views


There are two bloglands; one blogland exists with the glitched old format on the light side, and another blogland exists with the complicated new format on the dark side. Some bloggers have moved to the dark side, and other bloggers remain on the light side. Given that what is posted on the dark side does not appear here on the light side, though what is posted here does show up on the other side, it means that there is no single communal blogland. Things are definitely much quieter on the light side as the dark side sucks bloggers in.

Given that this situation is increasingly untenable and given that the site will move us all over to the dark side whether we like it or not, I am now preparing myself for the dark side. I am looking for help and tips from the dark side bloggers to help me navigate this journey. I am going to ask lots of questions.

Have you moved over to the dark side?
If not moved, do you plan to move over to the dark side or will you call it a day with blogland?
Do dark side bloggers re-post their posts on the light side after posting them on the dark side?
Do light side bloggers check comments on their blog posts on the dark side as well as the light side?


My blogging needs are quite basic. I like to submit a blog post, with a few photos, a few times a week; I like to read and reply to comments on my blog posts; I like to read and comment on the blogs I follow; and I like to read the replies to the comments I post on blogs.

A few days ago, I entered the dark side. It seemed much better than when I last entered. It is still a little busy and it is a little difficult having to remember the names of the blogs I follow as opposed to the usernames of the bloggers. I wonder whether bloggers will remember that my blog is called Sexy Times!

The system of alerts on the dark side telling me that someone has commented on my blog or replied to my comment on their blog seems very confusing and quite arbitrary. The alerts system seems partial and out-of-date.

However, there seems to be no glitches on the dark side. No stolen words, no mangled apostrophes!

What are the upsides of the dark side?
What are the downsides of the dark side?
If already on the dark side, what tips would you give me as I move over?
How do you ensure that you keep track of all new comments on your blog posts and all replies to your comments on the posts of other bloggers?
Is the help function on the dark side helpful?


When I move over to the dark side, I am going to edit the blurb describing my blog ensuring that the description is contained in a few lines as I suspect people will not click to read further details. I also want a private, sticky mailbox post for people to leave messages for me.

Are sticky posts allowed on the dark side?
Can comments on blog posts be made private on the dark side?


Given how blog posts are shown in the dark side, it looks as if the first few lines of a post are critical as they are the ones that people initially see when roam around the dark side. I am going to have get to the point quicker when I move over to the dark side. I am presuming that I do not have to post an obligatory first comment on my blog post for it to register.

Do the bold, underline and italics functions still operate on the dark side?
Is there a choice of colours and fonts on the dark side?
How many photos can be uploaded with a blog post on the dark side?
Is it simple to upload photos with a blog post on the dark side?
Is it easy to reply to comments on a blog post on the dark side?


There are levels and kudos on the dark side. I am not sure what my ascribed level 10 means and I am not sure what kudos are all about. Here on the light side, I have amassed a lot of points. Presumably, my points cannot be taken with me into the dark side. If I cannot take my points over, I am going to trade them in for a lightsaber to protect me against the evil of the dark side!

40 Comments
LEGLESS IN PORTSMOUTH
Posted:Jan 26, 2022 9:12 am
Last Updated:Feb 20, 2022 7:05 am
32991 Views


When I lived in Portsmouth, a navy city on the south coast of England, there was a bit of a boozy culture at work, a bit like that at Downing Street over the last two years where Boris Johnson has presided over at least 16 parties despite covid lockdowns and restrictions.

Staff would often retire to a local pub for an after-work drink that often did not end until the pub closed six hours later! There were quite a few drunken moments in Portsmouth, two such legless moments stand out.

Before one annual Christmas dinner, a few staff including my good self, decided to start drinking early at lunchtime just to get warmed up for the evening celebrations. I got so warmed off that I had to take a walk along the seafront in the vain hope of sobering up before the real festivities began. I decided to sit down on a bench to take in the bracing air. I fell asleep on the bench and by the time I woke up from my drunken sleep I had missed the dinner.

At a New Years Eve party, again attended by many work colleagues, I was talking to, okay I was trying to chat up, a woman from New Zealand in the kitchen. In the words of Jona Lewie, you will always find me in the kitchen at parties! But I made the mistake of mixing my drinks; I drank beer, wine, spirits and cocktails. As I was talking to the New Zealand woman I vomited all over her and collapsed to the floor. My friends had to undress me as my clothes were covered with sick and carry me to the nearest bed. I was told that the New Zealand woman was not impressed!

When was the last time you got drunk?
Have you had any embarrassing drunken moments?
Have you ever been too drunk to have sex?


Since leaving Portsmouth for Nottingham, I do not get so drunk when I go out. But there was one party, a sex party, where I drank far too much wine that I fell asleep on the toilet. Again my friends had to carry me to bed. And I did not get laid that night!

There was also a time, after a posh dinner in a hotel, where I did not get drunk but my partner did. After retiring to the bedroom we started to have sex but she fell asleep during the act. Yes, I am that good in bed!

23 Comments

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