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Can You Spare A Square?
Can You Spare A Square? I like to think that I am not a wasteful individual. That my ecological footprint upon the earth can be minimized with a bit of resourcefulness. After all, I had read on a tree hugger website that if everyone in the world lived like a U.S. citizen, we'd need over five planets to support ourselves. So, I'm thinking I should be able to improve. To make my footprint ever smaller. (Never smaller than a size 13, though. That would be too painful). I could be a bit more conscientious recycling my garbage. I could be more diligent in purchasing products made with the "greenest" technology possible. Then I thought of my dear old dad. He taught me my earliest lesson in frugality. I can still remember him telling me that I shouldn't use more than eight squares of toilet paper per poop. Yep, eight squares. I had never really counted before, but he was pretty intent that I understood that my limit was to be eight squares. I remember a few things occurred to me at the time. First, it would be hard for him to prove it if I went over the prescribed portion. Then, I thought that on occasion, a person had to use more than eight squares for some situations. Like, what about the times when you think your done, but after you wipe up (using all eight of your squares), you suddenly realize that you aren't as finished as you thought you were. Does this constitute a new poop? Did I earn eight more squares? Or am I SOL? Perhaps the rules could be stretched to mean eight squares for each little log? That would make it easy. A person could crap with pleasure, complimented with a wipe up without worry. Especially if you have those machine gun poops where they pinch out in hard little balls. Then again, that's no help really. Those hard little ones generally require less paper anyhow, don't they? And what about if I am pooping in another place? At a friends house, or in a public restroom? Do the eight squares follow me wherever I go? (Okay, they do. But hopefully somebody will tell me there are squares on my shoe). And, (horrors), what about diarrhea? Surely it takes more than eight in those situations. Right? Then there is the problem of pile. No, not the poop, rather the ply of the paper. If you have 2-ply paper, then you have a real shot at the squareness. If you have Charmin, that's really good. Gawd help you if you end up with single ply. Like Scott. In a pinch, such was the poopy pondering of that potty puppy, the young keithcancook. It's all true, I shit you not! Don't forget to flush, and blog on! |
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well dang. I can't figure out how to post a photo in here? Grr. . Oh well, blog on!
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Hope the photo wasn't an outhouse- they only have Sears (Virtual Symposium Group) use Virtual Symposium Group
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PS so does that mean 8 pages?? (Virtual Symposium Group) use Virtual Symposium Group
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You clearly had too much time on you hands today. Pinch off When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro. The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.
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This is a really shitty subject.
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Hope the photo wasn't an outhouse- they only have Sears Blog on!
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You clearly had too much time on you hands today. Pinch off Bombs away! er, I mean Blog on!
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This is a really shitty subject. Blog on!
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PS so does that mean 8 pages?? Blog on!
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lol ty for the laugh today hugs V Become a blog watcher sweet_vm
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No poops at all? I'd hate to be near whenever you fart... amp; Blog on!
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Never forget, Brain. The Venting Blog will always deliver the straight poop directly to its readers... Blog on!
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Ha! I love it when you guys respond in the spirit of the post. Hey, if ya really want to do more you can always use both sides of the paper... Blog on!
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lol ty for the laugh today hugs V Blog on!
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To poop or not to poop... I could share details of the things I do to be eco-conscious at home but then nobody from here would want anything to do with me.
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To poop or not to poop... I could share details of the things I do to be eco-conscious at home but then nobody from here would want anything to do with me. Agreed. Some things are just TMI. Yikes! Blog on!
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I know the perfect bag to store it in... Blog on! Great response.
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